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For many women, the engagement ring is the most important part of the proposal. The setting and the words being said matter, but most women simply care about the ring that they get. And for some, the ring can make a difference between a "yes" and a "no."
So clearly, a lot of thought should be put into purchasing it. And either you have to know your partner really well or you've consulted with someone who knows them very well.
This is all true for buying a new ring or having one custom made, but there is another option. Many people don't consider proposing with a family ring, but it is an option that carries a great deal of sentiment for many people.
For a lot of people, family is everything. This is either because they come from a large family and therefore have been involved with their family their entire life, or because they come from a small family and they cherish what family they do have. Either way, keeping family close is important to them.
If you are in a relationship with a person like this, someone who cherishes family and is proud of their family ties, you should consider proposing with a family ring. And by family ring, I simply mean a ring that belonged to a member of their family or yours.
Some people turn their nose up at the idea of wearing someone else's ring. They want their own ring. They want to be individual and special. They want to feel important.
And yet other people feel heart warmed by the connection and history behind a family ring. It brings a sense of unity and continuity to the relationship. It shows that family is as important to you as it is to them.
Perhaps it is a ring from a grandmother or mother or great-grandmother. Maybe an aunt that was very import in your life or theirs. Wherever the ring comes from, it is important that it has meaning to either you or her. It is important that you are making a statement with it about family as well as making a statement about your present commitment.
Perhaps you are proposing with a grandmother's ring. Perhaps they were happily married for 50 years and you hope for the same in your life.
Whatever the meaning behind it, it is important that it has meaning. It is important that it means something to the both of you. And it is important that your partner is someone who will appreciate the history, tradition, and family connection behind that ring.
Receiving a family ring is not for everyone. It may not be the ring that you've dreamed of. It may not be something that you would have pictured yourself wearing. But the sentiment behind it, the meaning behind it, makes neither of those things matter.
History and tradition are wrapped up tightly in the proposal and marriage process. Sometimes it's nice to add a little bit more to the mix. The ring will be special. The proposal will be special. And you will be carrying on a generation of commitment into the union you plan on building.
Not to mention, if you asked the relative to use their ring, then it includes them in the process. It creates ties to family that a new ring does not and cannot.
I've always loved the idea of family rings, generational rings. I love history. I love family. And the whole thing is wrapped up together in one. But many people can't or won't appreciate that gesture.
If you happen to be with someone who will, consider it an alternative to investing money in a new ring. You'll save money. You'll create a family bond. And you will make her feel special in more ways than you can imagine.
Not to mention, the craftsmanship on rings made generations ago can hardly be matched nowadays. A few custom jewelers may be able to come close, but things were made better back then. Time was put into the construction of things. And no mass-produced, jewelry store piece will really measure up.